Friday, July 3, 2015

The Conversations

My family is weird. Who am I kidding? We're pretty fucking different. We love each other, we hate each other, we're catty, we're bratty, we're loud, but we are always there for each other. That said, they have the unfortunate luck of being related to a blogger. Poor Boris and P.I.T.A...


We've had some crazy conversations. The numerous conversations I've had with Boris about bowel movements are un-printable. On a drive to a vacation destination, the conversation with P.I.T.A. went something like this:

Driving from PA to Cape Cod, MA...
P.I.T.A.: What's this button for?
A.I.K.E: The bottom glove box.
P.I.T.A.: What's this button for?...
A.I.K.E: The top glove box.
P.I.T.A.: What does 'b' mean?
A.I.K.E: It has to do with the engine.
P.I.T.A.: This song keeps saying that's not my name.
A.I.K.E: Yeah?
P.I.T.A.: So what's her name?
A.I.K.E: I don't know.
P.I.T.A.: Why don't you know? Why doesn't she tell us her name if that's not her name?
A.I.K.E: What?
P.I.T.A.: Who does this stupid song?
A.I.K.E: The Ting Tings.
P.I.T.A.: Is that her name?
A.I.K.E: No, the groups name.
P.I.T.A.: So what's her name?

Six hours later we were in Cape Cod...

P.I.T.A wanting to see 'Magic Mike'...
P.I.T.A.: Lets go see Magic Mike.
A.I.K.E: I don't want to.
P.I.T.A: Don't you want to see all those penis' jiggling around?
A.I.K.E: Nah. If it's going to jiggle it better be inside me...

There have been and I'm sure will be more insane conversations. Unfortunately for you, and my family, I will continue to document them here...Mwahahahaha

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A writer exercising the writing muscle.