Friday, June 19, 2015

The Bitch is Back

Well my friends, I knew it would happen someday. I just didn’t think I would be dumb enough to play such a big part in it…

I played the fool in a production called ‘Do You Write a Blog’.

See, my blog is anonymous. I like it that way. I know too many people who have posted things on Facebook or started a blog only to face repercussions and job loss because of it. 

So when my coworker found me on Pinterest, she noticed my blogging board and asked if I wrote one. Now a smart anonymous writer would say, ‘Me? Write a blog? Why no, I’m to dumb to put words together to form a sentence’ or 'Wow, I could never write something as insightful and incredibly funny as that blog' . I may know everything, but apparently I’m not smart enough to be deflective because I said, (drum roll please) ‘Sure I write a blog!’


It was only later that I realized what a fucking idiot I am. I don’t care if my coworkers know that I don’t like to get wet, or if they know I need a dictionary to read 'Murders In the Rue Morgue' or if they see the tampon chandelier. They must certainly know by now that I have Bitchy Resting Face…However, I did write a second post (which is now unpublished) about how much I hate feet..and it was set in the workplace.

Double DOH!

I was a embarrassed to be caught talking about someone else in the office. Well...someone else's feet actually...but still - my coworker knew I wrote it and who I was talking about. I was deflated, desolate, depressed. I stopped writing. And that is why I've been absent so long.

But you know what? Fuck it. That's right, who gives a shit? Why should I stop my creative juices from flowing just because someone knows who I am. And to be honest, it's not that hard to discover an anonymous writers identity - even without them saying 'Yup that's me'.

I’m back to my ‘who gives a shit’ attitude.

I’m the god damn rock star of hilarity! The blog is back bitches. Let the merriment begin!  Tra la la la la.

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A writer exercising the writing muscle.